Click on any image to enlarge.
The
titles in this series, like balloons in a comic strip matter.
Enjoy,
and comment.
Can you find the bowtie? A little puzzle for mystery enthusiasts.
"CHIEF PONTIAC STEPPED INTO THE COUNSEL, WHIPPED OPEN HIS ROBE EXPOSING A FERROCIOUS CLUTCH OF BEAR CLAWS AND SAID WITH A WRY SMILE, "LET THE GAMES BEGIN."
When this classic 30's Pontiac put its best tire forward, my imagination snapped back to a an equivalent scene from a native American past.
"YOU TINK IT'S FUNNY DAT MR. BIG HAS HIS HEAVY HEAT PAKED OUTSIDE A MOTEL FA BROWN BAG LOOSERS? WELL HE'S A FAMLIY MAN WIT POLITICAL ASPERATIONS, AN I'M DA NEW FACE OF HIS PUBLIC RELATIONS, SEE?"
I
was going to call this one Christie but liked this the car's reaction
better.
"AFTER A DISTINGUISHED CAREER IN PORCINE MANAGEMENT THEN GRAIN SUPPLY LOGISTICS, YA-423 BEGAN TO DOUBT GOD'S PLAN FOR HIS LIFE WHEN HE WAS CONSIGNED TO MONITOR WEED DEVELOPMENT BEHIND THE EQUIPMENT SHED."
I
have fun imagining what vehicles would say and think if they became
conscious. This is one of my reports on the lives of trucks.
"AFTER A NIGHT OF GAMBLING AND WILD DISSIPATION, 6 AM PASSED IN OBLIVION FOR THE LOCALS LEAVING ONLY OLD WILLY BUD, OUT BACK IN THE WEED LOT,
TO WITNESS THE POWER OF THE SUNRISE."
"SO BIG BOY, EVER FANTISIZE ABOUT A FULL SIZED WOMAN? GO AHEAD, STUDLEY, SLIP YOUR HAND UP MY FENDER AND LIFT MY BONNET. GET A PEEK AT WHAT OTHER MEN ONLY DREAM ABOUT."
What is it with vehicles that they get right in amongst some peoples sexuality. The owner of this one was so blatant about his attraction that he called it "the other woman."
"I'D ABOUT EMPTIED MY FITH OF JD WHEN OUTTA NOWHERE, THIS BIG BOZO GOT RIGHT UP IN MY FACE. I YANKED MY .44 AN DRILLED THAT S.O.B. CAUSE I WON'T TAKE THAT KINDA CRAP FROM A PICKUP THAT CAIN'T HOLD ITS LIQUOR!"
"AFTER A HI PERFORMANCE CANNABIS OIL CHANGE, OLD ALIEN EYES, COULD NO LONGER SEE ITSELF IN THE REAR VIEW MIRROR"
This hotrod embodies a trip out somewhere other than a road.
"DO WE HAVE A SORE INTAKE TODAY? WELL OPEN WIDE, STICK OUT YOUR BUTTERFLIES AND SAY 'WHAAAAAAAAA,' AND WE'LL JUST HAVE A LOOKSEE."
Scene from a hotrod doctors office.
"FOLLOWING THAT DISFIGURING ALTERCATION
WITH HIS PET JAGUAR, MACK QUIT
THE 'HUNK OF A TRUCK CIRCUIT'
AND PURSUED HIS OTHER OBVIOUS SKILL SET, JUNKYARD DOG AT WELDER BROS
MIDNIGHT AUTO RECYCLING."
Any career change the matches your physiognomy this well
is a solid plus for job security.
"LITTLE MISSY EAGLEAN WAS SO PROUD OF HER NEW EASTER CLOTHES THAT SHE PULLED UP HER DRESS IN CHURCH SO EVERONE COULD ADMIRE HER NEW EFI CORVETTE PANTIES."
Gee mom, what would happen if we combined the unfettered pride
in a hotrod show with the innocence of childhood?
“HAVING RECENTLY EMERGED FROM THE SEA, FLAMETOOTH, COULDN'T KEEP WORDS LIKE,
BONEY, SALTY, OR JUICY, FROM ATAVISTICALLY POPPING INTO HIS THOUGHTS
AS HUMANS INNOCENTLY STROLLED BY.”
This Crosby hotrod had a truly amazing paint job.
I was originally going to call it Crosby, Flametooth and Nash.
Unfortunately a shark had me by the writing hand.
"ONE BEAUTY QUEEN CALLED THE OTHER A SLUT FROM A DISCOUNT GARAGE. THE OTHER SMILED, KNOWING SHE HAD ALREADY WON BY SWITCHING OUT THE FIRST ONE'S LICENSE PLATE AS SHE SNORED SUNBATHING."
Hotrod shows are a little like beauty pageants so I imagined the snarky tricks that hotrods would play on each other if they really were beauty queens. Read the license plate.
TO WITNESS THE POWER OF THE SUNRISE."
What
if the expressions on vehicles, like a clock that has stopped,
are
perfectly expressive every once in a while?
"SO BIG BOY, EVER FANTISIZE ABOUT A FULL SIZED WOMAN? GO AHEAD, STUDLEY, SLIP YOUR HAND UP MY FENDER AND LIFT MY BONNET. GET A PEEK AT WHAT OTHER MEN ONLY DREAM ABOUT."
What is it with vehicles that they get right in amongst some peoples sexuality. The owner of this one was so blatant about his attraction that he called it "the other woman."
I
imagined what her 'come on' would have sounded like to him.
"I'D ABOUT EMPTIED MY FITH OF JD WHEN OUTTA NOWHERE, THIS BIG BOZO GOT RIGHT UP IN MY FACE. I YANKED MY .44 AN DRILLED THAT S.O.B. CAUSE I WON'T TAKE THAT KINDA CRAP FROM A PICKUP THAT CAIN'T HOLD ITS LIQUOR!"
Perhaps
it's not cool to make fun of the dysfunction of alcoholism or the
effects of substance abuse so I will excuse myself by mentioning that
we humans often engage in comedic laughter to fend of the darkest
aberrations of our nature. The grill attitude in his photograph got
me thinking how a drunk might react to such a presence.
"AFTER A HI PERFORMANCE CANNABIS OIL CHANGE, OLD ALIEN EYES, COULD NO LONGER SEE ITSELF IN THE REAR VIEW MIRROR"
This hotrod embodies a trip out somewhere other than a road.
"DO WE HAVE A SORE INTAKE TODAY? WELL OPEN WIDE, STICK OUT YOUR BUTTERFLIES AND SAY 'WHAAAAAAAAA,' AND WE'LL JUST HAVE A LOOKSEE."
Scene from a hotrod doctors office.
"FOLLOWING THAT DISFIGURING ALTERCATION
WITH HIS PET JAGUAR, MACK QUIT
THE 'HUNK OF A TRUCK CIRCUIT'
AND PURSUED HIS OTHER OBVIOUS SKILL SET, JUNKYARD DOG AT WELDER BROS
MIDNIGHT AUTO RECYCLING."
Any career change the matches your physiognomy this well
is a solid plus for job security.
"LITTLE MISSY EAGLEAN WAS SO PROUD OF HER NEW EASTER CLOTHES THAT SHE PULLED UP HER DRESS IN CHURCH SO EVERONE COULD ADMIRE HER NEW EFI CORVETTE PANTIES."
Gee mom, what would happen if we combined the unfettered pride
in a hotrod show with the innocence of childhood?
“HAVING RECENTLY EMERGED FROM THE SEA, FLAMETOOTH, COULDN'T KEEP WORDS LIKE,
BONEY, SALTY, OR JUICY, FROM ATAVISTICALLY POPPING INTO HIS THOUGHTS
AS HUMANS INNOCENTLY STROLLED BY.”
This Crosby hotrod had a truly amazing paint job.
I was originally going to call it Crosby, Flametooth and Nash.
Unfortunately a shark had me by the writing hand.
"ONE BEAUTY QUEEN CALLED THE OTHER A SLUT FROM A DISCOUNT GARAGE. THE OTHER SMILED, KNOWING SHE HAD ALREADY WON BY SWITCHING OUT THE FIRST ONE'S LICENSE PLATE AS SHE SNORED SUNBATHING."
Hotrod shows are a little like beauty pageants so I imagined the snarky tricks that hotrods would play on each other if they really were beauty queens. Read the license plate.
